Something personal

by Line

I’m not sure how to write this actually, but I want to say it to share my opinion and ease my mind a little bit, so I will do my best anyways. 

As most of you know I am pregnant and am expecting a little boy in August, and I will have full responsibility for him alone, officially put. Ergo, I will be a single mom. This “being alone” part has brought up a lot of questions, some that I don’t feel totally comfortable answering to be honest. First of all, the fact that the responsibility is all mine on paper does not mean that there won’t be two parents involved. Second of all, just because I will be a single mom does not mean that I was sleeping around and just happened to become pregnant with someone I barely know – and here comes the difficult part.

Somehow I feel really stupid when people ask what my relationship with the father is, because the fact is that he is my best friend. Not my boyfriend, not my ex-boyfriend – and not my boyfriend to be. Just, my best friend. He is the one that I trust a 100%, and the one I go to if I have a bad day or need to talk about something that’s bothering me. Why do I feel like this is a bad thing? Well, I don’t feel like it’s a bad thing, but I somehow feel that it labels me with something I don’t want to be labeled with. Stupid, irresponsible, maybe? It is really hard to describe actually, and it tends to bother me sometimes. When the doctor asked if I was sure about bringing the father when this baby pops out, for example.

I’m not even sure why I’m sharing it, but I think it would feel good to know your thoughts about it. Is it irresponsible, stupid, crazy, whore-ish and horrible to be so immensely short-sighted that you end up pregnant by your best friend?